Christmas Preparations

Where has the time gone? I haven't updated this blog for almost three weeks! I was doing so well and then the busyness of the holidays hit full force. I wish I could say I am one of those women who have my shopping done by Thanksgiving and the baking done by the 15th of December. Sadly, this does not describe me.


Our family has a couple of traditions which I can not omit no matter how far behind I may be in Christmas preparations. Years ago my mother-in-law saw a recipe in the local newspaper for coffee cakes. So, for over 40 years now, the Daubenmire girls make various numbers of these goey, cinnamony creations. My sister-in-law makes about 60 (seriously!) of them every year and hands them out to friends, mailmen, teachers, etc. I keep my numbers in the low 30's and still my kids complain that I "give them all away!"


Each recipe makes four cakes and I do two batches at a time. By now you may be thinking, I wonder if she gives out this great recipe or is it closely guarded? Anyone may have it at anytime but I assure you, you will in all likelihood choose to NOT make it after you read the directions.


These cakes are ridiculously step intensive. Kind of like living the Christian life! Just when I feel good about my prayer life, then I realize I am not reading the Word as often as I should. Or, I may be meeting with a young believer to get them grounded in the fundamentals but my own kids are choosing MTV over attending bible study. It seems like there is always something calling me upward and stretching me further. 


The step intensive Christian life provides far greater rewards  than our delicious coffee cakes. For one thing, they are eternal. Any investment I make pursuing God or people will last forever.


I don't care how many steps or how high the incline my walk with God leads me, He is a King worth serving and seeking forever.

Merry Christmas, Carol  (get it?...Christmas Carol)

I love the women in my neighborhood book club. We have been together over 15 years and have quite a catalog of read-books between us. Every one of us leads a busy life but for one night a month we drop the mundane and come together to chat about a book we may or may not have had time to read. 

While we are mostly made up of serious readers, we are a pretty laid back group. We typically do not spend tons of time discussing the book, often giving it a cursory "yay" or "nay" and then moving on to discuss what is going on in our lives. While I consider myself one of the more dedicated readers, it is the life stories that I love hearing the most. 

For some reason, women in the context of a neighbor’s home will share some pretty intimate things. Ok, wine is usually served and it may or may not play a part in the confessions. But even those who don’t imbibe tend to share their hearts to these other women.

image from freefoto.com

I am currently reading a book called Permission to Speak Freely by Anne Jackson. Her intro begins with, “In May 2008, I asked a question on my blog, FlowerDust.net What is the one thing you feel you can’t say in the church?” She apparently received hundreds of responses, both inside and outside the Christian faith. Her book seems (I am just getting started) to ask the question “why don’t we feel “safe” in church.

I will report some of her answers in upcoming blogs. For now I ask myself what I cannot say in church. How about you, reader, do feel permission to speak freely in all settings?

Over the River and Through the Woods

I am heading up to my hometown of Lancaster, Ohio, located halfway between Ohio State and Ohio University on Route 33 for the Thanksgiving Holiday. My husband and I both grew up in the same small town so we have lots of family in one place.  But this seems to be the year where everyone is with their in-laws so we will eat with a smaller than normal gathering.

My food assignments are: Mashed Potatoes (I am making the make-ahead recipe with sour cream and cream cheese), Sweet potatoes and green bean casserole. I can cook most of this ahead of time but transporting it hot for a two hour car drive is making me a little nervous.


Keeping things hot! Now how do I accomplish this task? Looking beyond my food assignments, how do I keep my passion for life/God "hot"? Lately, not feeling well with my colitis and some emotional stress has left me without a consistent glow for God.


Whenever I feel like my relationship with God is strained and leaving me low on the passion meter, if I can begin to reiterate my thankfulness for the little things, I tend to snap right back. 


Here are some of my things I am thankful for: a reliable car, a working furnace in my home, enough money to enjoy frivolous things such as eating out and buying the occasional expensive coffee drink, my children liking one another, a husband who doesn't mind putting the lights on the Christmas tree, a job, good friends, enough kitchen equipment to prepare meals for my family, living in a cul-de-sac, great neighbors, comforters to wrap up in, a warm coat, shoes, a dog that likes to give puppy kisses.


Sound silly? I need to recognize these small things in order to cultivate a softer heart and keep my passion hot for God.

image from FreeFoto.com

Life Goes On

I felt a little guilty bowling in the church league last night. 


Earlier in the day, while I was letting the dog out for her morning ritual, I heard a lot of sirens. As I stood listening on the deck, I could hear the blare abruptly stop, telling me the accident was close by. Sure enough, as I drove over the highway, on my way to my coffee date, I glanced down onto the freeway and saw chaos below. It looked like multiple cars were involved and traffic flow going North was completely shut down. My first thought was, "I hope it is no one I know", but then I chided myself, realizing it could be anyone, given the road is a major thoroughfare for this part of the country.


Turns out I did know the driver who caused the wreck.  She was the older sister of a close friend of my daughter's. Unfortunately, she and another woman died in the accident.  Now, four young children will grow up without their mother. A man without his wife.  At the time of this writing, one young girl still clings to life but certainly will have some complications if she lives. One young man lost his 25 year old bride. Lives are now changed forever.


How would I feel if I suddenly lost my child or spouse?  I would want just a little bit of everyone else's world to stop just as mine had stopped for me. A pause in the beat. I would want their normal to change.


Like I said, I felt a little guilty bowling last night.


Psalm 139:14-17   ¹⁴I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. ¹⁵My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; ¹⁶Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.  ¹⁷How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 

Emotion list

Last night a post-retreat group met to practice some of the skills we learned during our weekend at Kings Domain. My typical role in this group is to weigh in with a question or maybe a suggestion on how to rephrase someone else's clarifying question. But last night the group kindly gave me a few minutes to share what was going on in my heart. 

There's something about staying current with a small group of women who are there to support and encourage you. Encouragement and accountability can really flourish in these settings and I felt a connection with these women after only three meetings.

After sharing an area we struggle with, one thing we focus on is "next steps." Two of us walked away from the table with the same application: to make a list of our emotions. What am I feeling as I walk the difficult road I am walking? I believe it helps to put those feelings into words and onto paper.

So here is some of my current list:

Anger: Displeasure, hostility. An emotional state that may range in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage.

Resentful: Feeling of bitterness or indignation.

Sad: Unhappy. Feeling sorrow 

Frustration:  A deep dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs.

Depression: Pessimistic sense of inadequacy, lack of activity.

Self-pity: A self-indulgent dwelling on one's own sorrows or misfortunes.

Anxiety: An abnormal and overwhelming sense of apprehension often marked by physiological signs 

*Note: I am aware that the above list contains only negative emotions. I find some of them very difficult to deal with so that is why I listed them. There are many bright moments in my life with positive emotions but those are not the ones I am focusing on at the moment. While its not always good to dwell on the negative, the purpose of this exercise was to identify the negatives and try and diffuse some of the power they might have over me.

Reader, what are some emotions on your list?

Image by:  Filomena Scalise

Testimony

This week, Ann A. graciously invited me into her Thursday morning bible study to say a word or two on the subject of testimonies. Ann's class is studying the book of John and if I remember correctly, the first chapter mentions the word testimony or a variation of it, 14 times.

I get rather passionate about this subject.  It is one of the greatest tools a Christian has for sharing the Good News, right in their pocket. If you haven't memorized any salvation verses or you get frustrated when you try and explain the gospel message to someone (sometimes we know it in our head but have trouble putting it into words), the one thing we have is OUR OWN STORY. 

There are three main parts to a testimony: what you were like before, your conversion experience and how God has changed you?Think of a few sentences describing each part.

Think back to the time when you first became a believer?" Try to describe how you were before you knew that Christ died for your sins. Did you feel lost, alone, fearful, self-reliant  or even all of the above? 

What was the new understanding you embraced to bring about a change? Something like, "I realized Christ died for me or I knew my sin was separating me from God." 

How are you different now? Can you say you trust God has a plan for your life. Maybe you no longer live doing exactly what you want to do because you take into consideration God's way of living.

I encourage you, Reader, to spend some time thinking thru your own story. Hone it up because you never know when you might be called upon to share it.

1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, (NIV)

Tank Fillers

Whenever I go through tough times, my accountability group reminds me to pay attention to my "tank fillers". I need to seek out the things which make me smile, bring me comfort or are just plain fun! I read my go-to book about British tea drinkers, watch any of the versions of Pride and Prejudice or ride my scooter when the weather permits. But attending the Fairfield County Fair, one of my favorite events on the planet, fills me to the brim.

Racetrack, Grandstand and Mt. Pleasant

This final fair in Ohio always falls the week of Columbus Day. Besides the usual greasy, yummy  supremely caloric foods to feast on, the setting of this fair proves spectacular. Two giant wooden grandstands frame a white fenced racetrack where tractor pulls, marching band shows and horse racing take place throughout fair week. Lancaster's famous Mt. Pleasant sits majestically across the street from the fairgrounds, displaying its large sandstone face coiffed by colorful autumn foliage. It's a glorious scene at a magnificent time of year.

Me at the Fair!

I have a routine whenever I get to attend the fair. I eat the french fries right outside the grandstand. A walk through the Art Halls includes scanning the Grange displays, viewing the baked good entries and always a purchase of vanilla and cinnamon at the Watkins booth. And I never leave the grounds without a sentimental visit to the Firemen's tent. Here, two large framed picture collages show active and deceased Lancaster Firemen. A grandfather I never knew and a beloved uncle are among the deceased. Sometimes I shed a tear or two but mostly I smile inside, remembering stories of these men told to me by my mother. Speaking of which ... I miss my mother at this time of year most of all. She and I established these traditional routes among the food booths, animal barns and rides. The County Fair is just not the same without her.

No, I most certainly did not eat this!

My husband and I returned late Thursday night from this year's trip to the Fair. With my tank filled, I look to the weeks ahead as an opportunity for God to bestow His grace upon my stressed but full life. He, after all, is the only true tank filler!


Reader, what are your tank fillers?

2 Corinthians 1:5

^{5For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ.}

Do I Believe?

Last weekend I arrived at Kings Domain with bags in tow and a sense of expectation. I prepared by praying about who my conversations would include and who would I have an opportunity to encourage? I am not sure who I encouraged but plenty of women ministered to me. As I have said before, our family is going thru a difficult time. Apparently we are not the only ones! Often, when my eyes scanned the meeting room, I saw tears flowing. Watching women pursue growth and share their trials in the safe atmosphere of the retreat, fed my soul. 


So now that I am back home, I find myself in one of the most emotional weeks of my life. Why can't I hang on a bit longer to that great get-away feeling of communion with God? Why is my declaration of, "I am just going to trust God"  now sounding hollow and unconvincing? How can I go from proclaiming "I can do all things in Him who strengthens me" to, I don't want to get dressed and off the couch?


Do I believe what God says about Himself? Yes! Now to get it from my head into my heart!


I will repeat: 

Isaiah 54:10 (NIV)

 ¹⁰ Though the mountains be shaken
       and the hills be removed,
       yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
       nor my covenant of peace be removed,"
       says the LORD, who has compassion on you.

Fall

What's your favorite apple?

Ten things I Love about Fall:

1. I love the way the leaves smell like burnt sugar.
2. The the Fairfield County Fair, the best and final Ohio county fair of the summer season.
3. The expectation begins to build toward the Christmas season.
4. High School/College football games and Marching Band Contests.
5. Soup season begins.
6. Candy Corn.
7. Trips to Rouster's Apple Farm when there is a fire burning in the fireplace.
8. Big Bulky Cotton Sweaters.
9. The beginning of a new Bible Study Season.
10. Getting away for a Women's Retreat.

Retreat Thoughts

The Fall Retreat is about a week away! Since my thoughts have been focused on this large event for some months now, I will share a few of them.
Here goes:
• What am I looking forward to the most? Watching women getting excited about their personal/spiritual growth. I think we will all learn some great ideas on how to grow for His glory.
• What am I most grateful for? The work, time and prayer that have gone into the planning of the retreat by all those involved. Our two speakers, Ann and Marianne have been involved in more planning than the traditional role of speakers and that time and input is duly noted. Lynda Wick, retreat chair, has done an outstanding job keeping her team on task. (Working with great women is one of the perks of my job.)
• What am I going to miss at home while I am gone? My kids have all graduated from High School so I don’t have to worry about arranging rides to soccer games/band contests and such. That used to weigh on my mind whenever I went away. Now I have other things drawing my attention homeward but I am going to pray against my thoughts going anywhere but on the material and experiences that I am being exposed to that weekend. We only do big retreats like this every other year. I want to make the most of my time away.
• What am I doing to prepare this week? I am trying to cultivate an attitude of expectation. What does God have for me there? What conversations will He guide me into? How will I be used to encourage others?
If you are feeling wistful thinking that you were unable to attend this year … fear not! We will be sharing some of our growth ideas in a format most can become involved in. Details coming.

Safe Harbor

A couple of weeks ago I shared something difficult during Sunday’s sharing time. Its quite humbling to get up in front of a few hundred people and tell them your teenage daughter is expecting a baby. Even more humbling has been the ensuing response of the people at Faith Church. Immediately after the service I was surrounded by a group of women who had walked in my shoes. With tear brimmed eyes they gave me hugs and offered a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen. Since then, I have received notes, phone calls and even a personal visit from a former elder, all with the expressed message of encouragement and the declaration that I am not alone in whatever difficulty I might be experiencing. Women continue to thank me for bravely sharing our family trial with the church body.

And there lies the key word, “family”. I do consider the people of Faith Church, family and it is my prayer that you, Reader, do too. Close families go through tough times together. They support, encourage and love one another. I am feeling the love and I am grateful!

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NLT)
"All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.